Bringing home a newborn is often romanticised as a time of pure joy, endless cuddles, and picture-perfect moments. The reality? It’s a whirlwind of sleepless nights, unexpected challenges, and a steep learning curve. While there’s no shortage of advice on feeding schedules and sleep training, here’s the raw, unfiltered truth about those first three months—things no one quite prepares you for.
1. Sleep Deprivation Hits Differently
Yes, you’ve heard that newborns don’t sleep through the night, but nothing prepares you for the sheer exhaustion. It’s not just waking up multiple times—it’s the unpredictability. Some nights, they might sleep for a solid three hours, giving you false hope, only to wake every 45 minutes the next. You’ll swear you’ve never functioned on so little sleep. The trick? Nap when you can, lower expectations for housework, and tag-team with your partner if possible.
2. The Emotional Rollercoaster is Real
Between post-birth hormones, sleep deprivation, and the overwhelming responsibility of keeping a tiny human alive, emotions will be all over the place. One minute you’ll be staring at your baby, overwhelmed with love, and the next, you’ll be crying because your tea went cold—again. Postnatal blues are normal, but if you’re feeling persistently low, anxious, or detached, speak to your GP or health visitor.
3. You’ll Google the Strangest Things
From “Why is my baby’s poo green?” to “Is it normal for a newborn to sneeze so much?”, you’ll find yourself deep in the trenches of Google at 3 a.m. Spoiler: newborns do weird things, and most of them are completely normal. But always check in with your midwife or health visitor if something feels off.
4. Your Baby Might Not Want to Be Put Down—Ever
Some babies sleep soundly in their Moses basket, while others act like the mattress is made of spikes. If your little one only sleeps on you, you’re not alone. They’ve spent nine months being snug and warm inside you—adjusting to the outside world takes time. Babywearing can be a lifesaver, allowing you to get things done while keeping them close.
5. Breastfeeding is Hard (and That’s Okay)
If you choose to breastfeed, know that it’s not always as “natural” as people make it seem. Latching issues, cluster feeding, sore nipples—it can be tough. If you’re struggling, seek support early. And if breastfeeding doesn’t work out, formula feeding is not a failure. A fed baby is best, however that happens.
6. The “Village” You Need Might Not Be Obvious
The saying “it takes a village” is true, but modern parenting can feel isolating. You might not have family nearby, and friends without kids might not fully understand. Seek out local baby groups, connect with other new parents, and don’t be afraid to ask for help.
7. You Won’t Feel Like Yourself for a While
Your body, mind, and daily life have changed drastically. The pressure to “bounce back” is unfair—your body has just done something incredible. Be kind to yourself, prioritise recovery, and remember that adjusting takes time.
8. Everything is a Phase (Even the Hard Bits)
When you’re in the thick of it, it feels never-ending. But the sleepless nights, the colic, the cluster feeds—it all passes. Hang in there, take it one day at a time, and know that you’re doing an incredible job.
The first few months are tough, but they’re also full of tiny, beautiful moments that make it all worth it. So, grab that (cold) cup of tea, accept the chaos, and know that you’re not alone in this journey.
